Insomnia

And every minute I look at the clock Another hour has passed. This state of forever sadness  How much longer can it last? For while it’s fresh inside my mind Although it happened long ago, It cannot stop replaying Round and round and to and fro. Left alone by friends who swore To be here…

Dying Matters- Lets Talk!

So, it’s been some months since I last posted on here. Lots has happened since I last posted which in a nutshell include Fletcher’s pending autism diagnosis, Kelli began to really struggle emotionally recently, and I have gallstones (lucky me!) and am awaiting what looks like I will be needing my gallbladder removed as I’ve…

Lost.

Recently, more days than less I have started to feel pretty shit again. The life of a young widow with two kids isn’t easy. I’ve had to come to terms with losing the love of my life while trying to remain as normal a life as possible for the sake of my children. I put…

Forever and a day x

Dear Tom, I cannot believe a year has passed since you had to leave us. So much has happened since you have been gone. You wouldn’t believe how big both of the kids have got. They have changed so much in just one year. Kelli has really shot up and is growing into a beautiful…

A ton of bricks!

Grief…It’s hit me like a ton of bricks tonight and I don’t know why. I haven’t cried this much in months. I dread to think what the bags under my eyes will look like tomorrow.  I’m lying in bed and I just can’t stop thinking about Tom. His face, his smile, his laugh. I just…

11 months :(

I haven’t posted in a few months as I have been trying to rebuild my life and rediscover myself. You see, I am not the same person I used to be before I lost Tom. As I realise today marks 11 months since my wonderful husband died I find myself reflecting on the past year;…

6 months already =(

I am feeling a bit sorry for myself today. The main reason being that today marks 6 months since Tom died. I can’t understand how I have even managed to survive half a year without that amazing man who supported me through thick and thin. I don’t cry any where near as much as I…

I wasn’t expecting to cry today

This morning I am feeling emotional but very blessed at the same time. My wonderful, kind-hearted and brave little girl is growing up to be such a beautifully spirited young lady and I couldn’t be more proud of her. I knew mother’s day would have it’s obstacles this year as it’s usually a time when…

They put on a brave face

I’m feeling a bit pissed off tonight. One thing that really angers me sometimes is the fact that people seem to avoid talking about Tom or acknowledging the fact that I am a widow. Not everyone does this, but I can count on less than one hand the amount of people who still talk about…

Count your blessings <3

So, Valentines day has been and gone. I was feeling nervous in the run up to it knowing that I wouldn’t be spending the day with the love of my life. This time last year we were on a half term holiday with Kelli to South Wales. Who would have guessed that that holiday was…